Mistigram: @illarterate has ideas for all kinds of terrible ocean vacations. This bogus #teletext screen advertises an exciting pirate adventure. It was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2GSh4oe
Mistigram: sure, the pun doesn’t make any sense, but that’s not @xtcomics’ problem - he leaves it for you to deal with. This silly #ASCIIart / emoji comic strip was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2PJ4tXu
Mistigram: it’s been a crazy month full of the inexplicable, and why not cap it off with the strangest specimen from this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection? I don’t even know where to start, so let me just get out of the way and let you appreciate, uninhibited, xerO’s “CURSES! {tin,} foiled again!!!”
Mistigram: it may have lost something in translation from the Japanese, but any confusion only enhances our appreciation of this #Shift_JIS comic strip by @kalchano. In any case, urinalysis is hilarious in every language! This piece was included in this in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2DFteig
Mistigram: @glowglowmemes cuts to the heart of a critical matter with this essential meme, included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2WctAo3
Mistigram: from the #teletext desk of @illarterate comes this intriguing offer that is definitely not a scam. Sure, the pounds might be pretend, but even so, 25 pretend pounds must be better than none! This screen was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2DFiZdR
Mistigram: in keeping with the longstanding #teletext tradition of advertisements for holiday vacation packages, @illarterate offered up this impossible cruise through some of the world’s driest dunes. This screen was included in the MIST0418 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2J0S2F5
Mistigram: in this readymade, K-thulu’s wife finally stooped to the level of his frivolity and contributed this specimen of algorithmically self-answering question. This piece was included in the MIST0417 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2W7bd3E
Mistigram: none of us even drew this jolly walking phallus #ASCIIart, we just stole it wholesale from one (checks notes) R. Noble and ran it for larfs in our MIST0496 artpack collection released 23 years ago this month. http://bit.ly/2UN1azv
Mistigram: emphasising the foolishness of April Fool’s, here’s one of Mister Fire-man’s posters for his annual clown parade, which we included in the MIST1016 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2ZHbnkA
Mistigram: and as an early lunchtime treat we offer up this appetizing kaleidoscopic image by @fractallearning. It was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. (Do try not to imagine what kind of foodsafe scene lies behind the reflection.) http://bit.ly/2VlgAzh
Mistigram: if you’re not confused by this @snakepetsken #PETSCII tribute to the ZX Spectrum, you’re not paying attention. On both the micro and macro levels it acts as a species of “what’s wrong with this picture?” challenge. Initially whipped up with the intent of baffling judges at a demoparty, it was ultimately released in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2DBG4y3
Mistigram: rise and shine! It’s time for a special announcement from @nbreakfast’s Pebble smartwatch! This image was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2W6Qpta
Mistigram: and @jellica_______ brings cats and dogs together at long last to demonstrate that in regards to animal-related humour, as in all matters, appeal is largely a matter of taste. This #teletext screen was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2UJbTeg
Mistigram: cats and dogs, all kinds of pets today here on Mistigram. Here’s a #pixelart pet by @mentalpoppixels with impressively glamorous gams. Inexplicable and marvelous! This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2ZvCeA5
Mistigram: Illarterate hardly has a monopoly on bizarre #teletext screens - on a good day, @jellica_______ can out-weird him right from the starting gate. “Hot Chicken Chat” stands testimony to this fact. This screen was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2ID6NOT
Mistigram: in April, in honour of April Fool’s Day, we share much that is inexplicable and unjustifiable. Here is a specimen courtesy of @taffi_louis, deliberately misinterpreting standard #SpiderMan body language for jollies. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2XCz6QY
Mistigram: you never know for sure with @illarterate, but I presume this fly-themed #teletext screen belongs with the others, in the FlyFax videotex service from the redacted fly-themed video game Selfie: Sisters of the Amniotic Lens. This screen, included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection, suggests that flies employ FlyFax as a parallel service to Yelp that works Bizarro-style, where worse and worse descriptors make a dining experience more and more appealing. http://bit.ly/2IDv4nX
Mistigram: @jellica_______ also took part in the second Blender round last weekend and offered this #teletext illustration to suit the themes of EMPRESS / DEFENDING / RESTAURANT. For his troubles, he took home another 3rd place ranking plus a bonus point for taking part in both compos. You can see all of the entries for both of this year’s Blenders up at http://bit.ly/2W1nruB http://bit.ly/2DumrYR
Mistigram: @polyducks took part in the Blender compo last week as well, offering up this RexPaint #PETSCII portrait of the #Wendys mascot to suit the themes of EMPRESS / DEFENDING / RESTAURANT and earning 2nd place in the compo for his troubles. You can enjoy all the entries, winning and otherwise, up at http://bit.ly/2W1nruB http://bit.ly/2W1nvKR
Mistigram: here is @jellica_______’s clever third-place-winning #teletext screen on the subjects of SUPERMODELS / MARTIAL ARTS / HAUNTED RUINS, drawn for this year’s Blender improvised art competition held last weekend. The compo artpack has just been released at http://bit.ly/2W1nruB, so you can also check out all the works by @fuelwtf members who trounced our Mistigris entries, the first we’ve offered up since the turn of the century if I’m not mistaken. http://bit.ly/2DpMr7p
Mistigram: by popular demand, here it is, sequel to perhaps the most unpopular @glowglowmemes piece we have ever shared - further adventures in alternate takes on wikihow illustrations. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2viJYau
Mistigram: if memory suggests correct, @illarterate minted this #teletext fanart for the “Totally Turts & Phants” segment of the @digitiser2000 prelude Mr. Biffo’s Found Footage, a very strange webseries you can enjoy on YouTube today! So the screen, included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection, could be considered funny by proxy. http://bit.ly/2VZpy21
Mistigram: I’m so sorry. There are so many issues with this #ANSIart advertisement for Genocide Kitten’s BBS the Neon Jesus, but if I can’t share it today, when can I? It was released in the MIST0696 artpack collection 23 years ago. http://bit.ly/2ILY7oQ
Mistigram: perhaps peak artscene 4/20 celebration (no, that would feature Spawn), here’s an #ANSIart illustration by Xeryrus, advertising the BBS Ground Zero, of ‘90s funny pages champion Calvin taking a big drag off of a hand-rolled spliff. It was released in the MIST0695 artpack collection 24 years ago. http://bit.ly/2PjgTFj
Mistigram: sooo… 4/20, eh? Every letter in this distinctive experimental monochrome Platinum #ANSIart logo for his BBS Illegal Error has got some kind of unlawful activity represented in it, carved out in negative space. Letter “e” is distinctively a marijuana leaf. (Are those joints in the adjacent “l” s?) Anyhow, there you go! This piece was released as part of a logocolly in the MIST0996 artpack collection 23 years ago. http://bit.ly/2IMFm4r
Mistigram: any answer to the question “why did Max Mouse draw a lemon and a lime facing off in gladiatorial combat to settle the fate of the kingdom of Sprite?” would be disappointing. Why it happened is immaterial; that it happened is the only item of significance here. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2L04Qhk
Mistigram: by @the_mythical_man, here is the Chewbacca Defense of still life painting: it makes no sense that the sunflower is in a toaster, therefore you must acquit. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2GwbJmj
Mistigram: surely this @zxguesser #teletext screen makes more sense with a modicum of the context from which it was rudely ganked, but since our April mission is more to celebrate the absurd than to enshrine understanding, this is all you get, from this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2ILxQH1
Mistigram: from the portfolio of the AWOL Freelance Pete comes this perfectly decent vector illustration of something utterly preposterous with profound paleontological ramifications. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you… the viviparous Pregosaurus. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2GpgqNy
Mistigram: @glowglowmemes does it again. The initial sculpture puts a postmodern spin on the tradition of equestrian statuary, then the caption puts a further postmodern spin on that, leaving such a heady remix that we may well never find out just what it’s supposed to mean. (Joke’s on you, it was never intended to be meaningful in the first place!). This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2UJzxfp
Mistigram: since people have the gargoyles and chimeras of Notre Dame on their minds this week, here’s an old drawing that’s profoundly inappropriate on some level, a @theresaoborn design for a beer pong-winning frat boy dudebro-goyle who chucks his biscuits every time it rains. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2GmJuW9
Mistigram: @horsenburger had such a strong response to the #Pudsey the Dog movie that he came up with a modest #teletext proposal for a sequel, to be given a single screening in one theater, canonically closing the door on the celebrated canine and any chance of further sequels. This screen was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2KX3NPA
Mistigram: @glowglowmemes masterfully executes a metameme, included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2PgxSIe
Mistigram: taking colloquial language literally - a bottomless wellspring of humour. It’s another #ASCIIart / #emoji gag at @xtcomics’ bar, included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2v9QXCP
Mistigram: now you can see how the artist mints their wares! This is a 100% accurate reproduction of @illarterate’s Wigan #teletext studio. (He has different transparent etch-a-sketch layers to convey the impression of colour.) This screen was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2Piz1PE
Mistigram: and a day in April isn’t complete without something from @glowglowmemes, some very strange images setting up an impressively committed 9/11 truther pun. Because those are funny, right? http://bit.ly/2ZfkCbt
Mistigram: @taffi_louis is a DJ, so a lot of his joke memes are music gags. This one juxtaposes the diminutive Marvel super-hero with English new wave singer #AdamAnt, who sometimes adopts comic book level costumery. That’s it, that’s the joke. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2UmIfei
Mistigram: given the oblique references to flies, this @illarterate #teletext screen most likely also originates from his faux Ceefax service in the game Selfie: Sisters of the Amniotic Lens. And now I’ll just wrap this blurb because nothing else I might add can top that! This screen was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2ZfpFZr
Mistigram: EXCUSE ME! Could we have a little PRIVACY please?! K-thulu continues in his very slow mission to celebrate the intimate lives of inanimate objects. This piece was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2KDDygF
Mistigram: if musicians were action figures you could come up with new ones by simply repainting portions of their molds. So it is with @jellica_______ ’s #teletext portrait of #RichardDJames, having decided that a reskinned Kurt Cobain was close enough for his #AphexTwin purposes. This screen was included in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2UZlSQz
Mistigram: you have to be some kind of savant to swing a pun three different ways, but if anyone was up to the feat it would have to have been Onyx. I believe he even sells this achievement on t-shirts! But you can find it in this month’s MIST0419 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2KEsKis
Mistigram: you can ask @misfit_blocktronics to explain this one, as he is the one who mashed up the photo of Mistigris founder @nicheinterests (who is, appropriately, playing a big accordion gig at @wisehallandlounge tonight!) and true-to-life caption together into this prime specimen of cognitive dissonance. It was also included in last year’s MIST0418 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2VL0RWU
Mistigram: from last year’s MIST0418 artpack collection, here’s a piece of sublime #teletext frivolity by @illarterate. Don’t settle for one of those conventional immobile cows, splurge on the best! http://bit.ly/2GmDtcY
Mistigram: a classic readymade, Candide took this stock image from a Photoshop tutorial and endowed it with a suitable caption to represent our online posse #TABNet circa, well, its release 23 years ago in the MIST0996 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2IxuIOW
Mistigram: during April weekdays we share recent nonsense, but on the weekends we share historical nonsense. Here’s a simple but profound meme exploring a new look for Nine Inch Nails’ #TrentReznor, made by
@glowglowmemes and included in our music themed MIST0119 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2Gb8xv1
Blender(s) 2019 are in effect! The topics for this improvised art competition are (due 10 pm EST) EMPRESS / DEFENDING / RESTAURANT and (due 8 pm EST Apr 14) SUPERMODELS / MARTIAL ARTS / HAUNTED RUINS. Details at http://bit.ly/2nsCoUj, submissions to info@mistigris.org http://bit.ly/2Dg7Ksi
Mistigram: from Blender #36, here’s Dead Soul’s newschool #ASCIIart attempt to synthesise the ideas of Batman / funk / Las Vegas. You can find this piece in the MIST1197 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2XbakqK
Mistigram: from Blender number 5 way back in the mid ‘90s, here’s @frandroid making an #ANSIart illustration (complete with a mini study in the corner) of the subjects running / from beans / at Canada’s Wonderland. You can find many early Mistigris Blender entries in the MIST1197 artpack collection, and of course you can also take part in a Blender compo in a few hours, details at http://bit.ly/2nsCoUj http://bit.ly/2ZaRl1q
Mistigram: in the vein of today’s Blender improvised art competition (details at http://bit.ly/2nsCoUj), here’s @horsenburger’s entry for the spontaneous art compo at last year’s Blocktoberfest #teletext conference, blending together the subjects of parrot / robot / and Halloween. This screen was included in the MIST1118 artpack collection. http://bit.ly/2G8Mntu
